添削をお願いしたいです。(質問ではなくてすみません。)
英語を伸ばしたい為に、ライティングを行っています。文章の内容はとても浅はかですがそれも改善していきたい点ですのでよろしくお願い致します。
If you were offered a job to be an astronaut, would you take it?
---Yes, I definitely would take it because I wanna get a new experience and see earth from the outside. I guess it will be such a wonderful and beautiful. Normally we can't go to space, we would need to study hard, train the body, and have perfect physical ability. It is too difficult to be an astronaut. However if someone offered it to me, It is easy to be an astronaut rather than becoming it by my own efforts. This is my opinion.
回答
If you got an job offer as an astronaut, would you accept it?
—-Yes, I would definitely accept it because I want to get new experience and see the Earth from space. It will be magnificent view. In my opinion, I’ll need to study hard and train my body in preparation for going into space. It’s too difficult for me to be an astronaut, however, I believe that I must be able to work even harder than I expected if I had that opportunity.
あくまで一例です。
experience は不可算名詞の場合があります。
Earth は the Earth です。
magnificent は extremely beautiful という意味です。
in my opinion は、私としては不要な気がしました。
宇宙へ行く は、go into space です。
It is easy...以降、言いたいことがちょっとピンと来ない部分がありましたが、このような内容で合っていますか?
Yes, I definitely would take it because I would like to get a new experience and see Earth from outer space. I would assume that it would be a wonderful and beautiful view. Normally we cannot reach outer space. To do so, we would need to study hard, train our bodies, and develop excellent physical abilities. It is too difficult to become an astronaut. However, if someone offered me such a job, I would be able to walk on a more realistic path to become an astronaut than trying to become one through my own efforts. This is my opinion.
添削、大歓迎です。英語学習に絶対に必要なプロセスです。最後から二番目の文は、宇宙飛行士になるのに easy という言葉は適切でないように感じたので、恐縮ですが、丸ごと変えさせていただきました。ご質問があればお知らせください。